! X-NEWS: spcvxb news.groups: 18700 I Relay-Version: VMS News - V6.0 13.10.90 VAX/VMS V5.4; site spcvxb.spc.edu l Path: spcvxb.spc.edu!rutgers!usc!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!uwm.edu!linac!att!cbfsb!cbnewsf.cb.att.com!forbes Newsgroups: news.groups & Subject: Usenet Olympic Games -- Day 12 Message-ID: <1991Aug25.042105.27857@cbfsb.att.com>2 From: forbes@cbnewsf.cb.att.com (michael.s.forbes) Date: 25 Aug 91 04:21:05 GMT Sender: news@cbfsb.att.com$ Organization: AT&T Bell Laboratories; Keywords: 1991 Usenet Olympic Games -- exclusively on USPN! ; Summary: Men's Flamer Baiting and 400-Post Relay highlights 
 Lines: 151  / The Usenet Sports Programming Network presents:   ,                           Exclusive coverage  &                                 of the  1                       Men's Flamer Baiting Finals         >      |9| |8| |9| |9| |4|                "Four!?  You sh*thead!@        \o  \O  \o  \O  \U               I'm gonna take that cardA         |   |   |   |   |                 and shove it up your--" C --------------------------------- \ - o --------------------------- +                                    '--|--__ C _____________________________________ | ___________________________ '                                       | (                                      / \)                                     /   | *                                   _/_  _|_  B Brought to you by the Energizer.  It just keeps going and going...   [Fade to an ice rink.]   Peter:> >This is Peter Arnett here at Chuq Arena, where we're about to< >witness the finals of the men's Flamer Baiting competition. > C >Now stepping onto the ice is Joe Newcomer, from the comp.sys.amiga 6 >hierarchy.   Let's see what Joe's routine looks like:   Joe: >Post to groups:  comp.sys.*8 >Subject:         My Amiga is faster than your computer! >(entering vi mode) A >Heck, my Amiga can EMULATE your computer, and even the emulation 9 >is twice as fast your machine!  It's faster than a Cray!    Peter:B >Joe's melted a small puddle of ice, and the judges are giving himA >a 7.4 overall.  Not a very high score, I'm afraid; his theme was > >not the most original we've seen here at the Usenet Olympics. > B >The Zamboni machine is clearing the rink, and our next athlete is# >Roger Noe, from rec.arts.startrek:    Roger:0 >Post to groups:  news.groups, rec.arts.startrek4 >Subject:         K*nt is trying to change The Name! >(entering vi mode) @ >Death to the infidel running-dog pagan fool who defies the gods@ >and dares to insert ".sf" in The Sacred Name!  Phasers on kill!   Peter:B >Roger's up to his neck in water!  What an impressive performance!C >The judges are giving him a perfect 10 -- oh no!  The Soviet judge A >has been overthrown in a coup, and the eight new judges are each B >giving Noe's performance a 3!  That lowers his overall score to aB >5.3, and puts him in second place so far.  Tough break for Roger. > C >Next up, the defending champion:  Kent Paul Dolan, from alt.flame!    Kent: C >Post to groups:  news.groups, news.admin, alt.flame, talk.bizarre, 7 >                 rec.arts.sf-lovers, rec.arts.startrek  >Subject:         You're a >                 bunch of >                 brain-dead >                 nitwits! >(entering vi mode)  >You stupid  >sheep couldn't  >reorganize  >a newsgroup
 >if I led you  >through it  >myself! >  >----------  >Grand Convener, >net.* reorg   Peter:: >He's flooded the arena!  The judges are drowning!  <glug>     Bryant: ? >Peter, are you still there?  Peter... This is Bryant Gumbel in ? >Atlanta with USPN coverage of the Usenet Olympic Games.  We're A >having some technical difficulties with our Flamer Baiting crew, * >and we'll go back there in a few moments. > @ >We're taking you now to the 400-Post Relay already in progress.# >USPN's Chris Berman has an update:   / The Usenet Sports Programming Network presents:   ,                           Exclusive coverage  &                                 of the  *                             400-Post Relay    C Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: ?                                                      o        o @                               U        U          __/_     __/__=        O        O          __/_     __/__          /  \===/ / =     __/_     __/__          /  \===/ /          __/|       /\ >      /  \===/ /          __/|       /\            /       /  \C - __/|-------/\------------/-------/--\----------/-------/---/----- C ----/-------/--\----------/-------/---/---------------------------- C ---/-------/---/ -------------------------------------------------- C -------------------------------------------------------------------   A Brought to you by the Ford Pinto Historical Preservation Society.   
 Chris Berman: A >Bryant, we've got an exciting matchup here in the 400-Post Relay " >semi-finals.  Here are the teams: > B >Lane 1:  rec.arts.startrek    "Tasha Yar is a Romulan Spy" thread1 >Lane 2:  comp.sys.mac.*       "Bug in System 7?" 7 >Lane 3:  rec.arts.comics      "Overweight Superheroes" A >Lane 4:  rec.arts.sf-lovers   "Orson Scott Card & Homosexuality" : >Lane 5:  news.groups          "Look what Kent mailed out" > < >Each of these threads has well over 400 posts, and with the? >exception of comp.sys.mac.*'s entry, there's plenty of flaming C >going on out there.  They're rounding the turn now, and here comes > >Peter "da gold and" da Silva in the lead, followed closely by >Tim "David" Lynch.  > A >Da Silva is making the handoff to "giant rat of" Subrata Sircar, ? >while Lynch hands his baton to "Downtown" Mike (Vidiot) Brown. @ >Here comes Dean "just between me and" Yu from comp.sys.mac.*... > C >Uh-oh!  Mike Brown has stumbled!  He forgot to put a ^L at the top @ >of a potential spoiler post; it looks like the news.groups team3 >has got this one wrapped up.  Back to you, Bryant.    Bryant: = >Thanks for the update, Chris.  Stay tuned for more exclusive 8 >coverage of the 1991 Usenet Olympic Games here on USPN.  
 Don Pardo:= >Coming up:  Tape delay highlights from Beating a Dead Horse!    [to be continued...]