s X-NEWS: spcvxb alt.folklore.computers: 3464Relay-Version: VMS News - V6.0 10/3/90 VAX/VMS V5.3; site spcvxb.spc.edu t Path: spcvxb.spc.edu!njin!princeton!udel!wuarchive!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!rpi!bu.edu!shelby!agate!ucbvax!ucsd!gkn" Newsgroups: alt.folklore.computers! Subject: Re: Alice's Lisp Machine  Message-ID: <19164@ucsd.Edu>% From: gkn@ucsd.Edu (Gerard K. Newman)  Date: 18 Sep 90 18:33:55 GMT< References: <LENNOX.90Sep16154146@minilove.diag.stratus.com> Distribution: alt , Organization: San Diego Supercomputer Center Summary: Here 'tis. 
 Lines: 299    8              Chris Stacy, Alan Wecsler, and Noel Chiappa  E         This song is called "MIT's AI Lab". It's about MIT and the AI C Lab, but "MIT's AI Lab" is not the name of the lab, that's just the < name of the song. That's why I call the song "MIT's AI Lab."  D         Now it all started two full dumps ago, on Thanksgiving, whenC my friend and I went up to visit the hackers at AI lab on the ninth F floor. But the hackers don't always live on the ninth floor, they justF go there to use these complex order code stack machines they call Lisp	 Machines.   G         And using a special purpose processor like that, they got a lot D of room upstairs where DDT used to be, and havin' all that ROOM theyE decided that they didn't have to collect any garbage for a long time.   C         We JFCLed up here and found all the garbage in there and we F decided that it'd be a friendly gesture for us to take all the garbage down to the system dump.  E         So we took the half-a-meg of garbage, put it in the back of a = red ECL Multibus, took subrs and hacks and implementations of 3 defstruction, and headed on toward the system dump.   B         Well, we got there and there was a big pop up window and aC write protect across the dump sayin', "This Garbage Collecter Under ? Development on Thanksgiving," and we'd never heard of a garbage G collector NOP'd out on Thanksgiving before, and with tears in our eyes, A we CDR'd off into the sunset lookin' for another place to put the  garbage.  H         We didn't find one 'til we came to a side area, and off the sideF of the side area was three hundred megabyte disk, and in the middle ofF the disk was another heap of garbage. And we decided that one big heapF was better than two little heaps, and rather than page that one in, we. decided to write ours out. That's what we did.  F         Branched back to the Lisp Listener, had a Chinese ThanksgivingG dinner that couldn't be beat, went to SI:PROCESS-WAIT SLEEP, and didn't = get up until the next quantum, when we got a funcall from Mr. ; Greenblatt.  He said, "Kid, we found your name on a cons at F the bottom of a half-a-meg of garbage and I just wanted to know if you had any information about it".  D         And I said, "Yes sir, Mr. Greenblatt, I cannot tell a lie. ID put that structure under that garbage." After speakin' to GreenblattA for about forty-five million clock ticks on the telnet stream, we E finally arrived at the truth of the matter and he said that we had to E go down and link up the garbage, and also had to go down and speak to B him at the Lisp Machine Factory. So we got in the red ECL Multibus@ with the subrs and hacks and implementations of defstruction and* headed on toward the Lisp Machine Factory.  F         Now, friends, there was only one of two things that GreenblattD could've done at the Lisp Machine Factory, and the first was that heD could've given us another 64K board for bein' so brave and honest onF BUG-LISPM (which wasn't very likely, and we didn't expect it), and theE other thing was that he could've flamed at us and told us never to be B seen BLTing garbage around in the vicinity again, which is what we	 expected.   @         But when we got to the Lisp Machine Factory, there was aC third COND-clause that we hadn't even counted upon, and we was both C immediately Process-Arrested, Deexposed, and I said, "Greenblatt, I D can't GC up the garbage with these here ARREST-REASONS on". He said:I "Output-Hold, kid, and get in the back of the Control CAR." ...And that's B what we did...sat in the back of the Control CAR, and drove to the. sharpsign quote open scene-of-the-crime close.  D         I wanna tell you 'bout the town of Cambridge, Massachusetts,F where this is happenin'. They got seven hunnert stop signs, no turn on7 red, and two campus police CARs, but when we got to the B sharpsign-quote-open scene-of-the-crime close, there was five LispD Machine hackers and three scope carts, bein' the biggest hack of theB last ten years and everybody wanted to get in the HUMAN-NETS story	 about it.   F         And they was usin' up all kinds of digital equipment that they< had hangin' around the Lisp Machine Factory. They was takin'G backtraces, stack traces, plastic wire wraps, blueprints, and microcode E loads...And they made seventeen 1K-by-32 pixel multi-flavored windows C with turds and arrows and a scroll bar on the side of each one with ? documentation panes explainin' what each one was, to be used as  evidence against us.  A ...Took pictures of the labels, blinkers, the cursors, the pop up C notification windows, the upper right corner, the lower left corner 5 ...and that's not to mention the XGP'd screen images!   I         After the ordeal, we went back to the Factory. Greenblatt said he G was gonna locate us in a cell. He said: "Kid, I'm gonna INTERN you in a ) cell. I want your manual and your mouse."   H         I said, "Greenblatt, I can understand your wantin' my manual, soF I don't have any documentation about the cell, but what do you want myJ mouse for?" and he said, "Kid, we don't want any window system problems". B I said, "Greenblatt, did you think I was gonna deexpose myself for litterin'?"   D         Greenblatt said he was makin' sure, and, friends, GreenblattH was, 'cause he took out the left Meta-key so I couldn't double bucky theA rubout and cold-boot, and he took out the Inspector so I couldn't E click-left on Modify, set the PROCESS-WARM-BOOT-ACTION on the window, C *THROW around the UNWIND-PROTECT and have an escape. Greenblatt was  makin' sure.  H         It was about four or five hours later that Moon--(remember Moon?G This here's not a song about Moon)-- Moon came by and, with a few nasty F sends to Greenblatt on the side, bailed us out of core, and we went upB to the Loft, had another Chinese dinner that couldn't be beat, andE didn't get up until the next evening, when we all had to go to court.   E         We walked in, sat down, Greenblatt came in with the seventeen ? 1K-by-32 pixel multi-flavored windows with turds and arrows and  documentation panes, sat down.  ?         McMahon came in, said, "All rise!" We all stood up, and D Greenblatt stood up with the seventeen 1K-by-32 pixel multi-flavoredD windows with turds and arrows and documentation panes, and the judge6 walked in, with an LA36, and he sat down. We sat down.  D         Greenblatt looked at the LA36... then at the seventeen multiE flavored windows with the turds and arrows and documentation panes... B and looked at the LA36... and then at the seventeen 1K-by-32 pixelE multi-flavored windows with turds and arrows and documentation panes,  and began to cry.   H         Because Greenblatt came to the realization that it was a typicalD case of LCS state-of-the-art technology, and there wasn't nothin' heC could do about it, and the judge wasn't gonna look at the seventeen ? 1K-by-32 pixel multi-flavored windows with turds and arrows and @ documentation panes, explainin' what each one was, to be used as evidence against us.  D         And we was fined fifty zorkmids and had to rebuild the world load...in the snow.     7         But that's not what I'm here to tell you about. '         I'm here to talk about the Lab.   F ----------------------------------------------------------------------G         They got a buildin' down in Cambridge called Technology Square, F where you walk in, you get your windows Inspected, detected, neglected
 and Selected!   F         I went down and got my interview one day, and I walked in, satH down (slept on the beanbag in 926 the night before, so I looked and feltE my best when I went in that morning, 'cause I wanted to look like the5F All-American High School Tourist from Sunnyvale. I wanted to feel likeI ... I wanted to be the All-American Kid from Sunnyvale), and I walked in,sD sat down, I was gunned down, brung down, locked out and all kinds of mean, nasty, ugly things.   H         And I walked in, I sat down, KAREN gave me a piece of paper that' said: "Kid, see the CLU hackers on XX.".  D         I went up there, I said, "Eliot, I wanna lose. I wanna lose!C I wanna see hacks and kludges and unbound variables and cruft in myyB code! Eat dead power supplies with cables between my teeth! I mean lose! lose! lose!"  F         And I started jumpin' up and down, yellin' "LOSE! LOSE! LOSE!"F and Stallman walked in and started jumpin' up and down with me, and weE was both jumpin' up and down, yellin', "LOSE! LOSE! LOSE! LOSE!!" and    some professorD came over, gave me a 6-3 degree, sent me down the hall, said "You're; our distinguished lecturer." Didn't feel too good about it.o  G         Proceeded down the infinite corridor, gettin' more inspections,nC rejections (this IS MIT), detections, neglections, and all kinds of : stuff that they was doin' to me there, and I was there for@ two years... three years... four years... I was there for a longE time goin' through all kinds of mean, nasty, kludgy things, and I washD havin' a tough time there, and they was inspectin', injectin', every8 single part of me, and they was leavin' no part unbound!  F ----------------------------------------------------------------------  G         Proceeded through, and I finally came to see the very last man. F I walked in, sat down, after a whole big thing there. I walked up, andF he said, "Kid, we only got one question: Have you ever been arrested"?  J         And I proceeded to tell him the story of the half-a-meg of garbageF with full orchestration and five-part harmony and stuff like that, and other phenomenon.y  G         He stopped me right there and said, "Kid, have you ever been toa> court"? And I proceeded to tell him the story of the seventeen? 1K-by-32 pixel multi-flavored windows with turds and arrows andi documentation panes...    G         He stopped me right there and said, "Kid, I want you to go over G and sit down on that bench that says 'LISP Machine Group'... NOW, KID!"e  E         And I walked over to the bench there, and there's... The LISPLE Machine Group is where they put you if you may not be moral enough to 0 join Symbolics after creatin' your special form.  F         There was all kinds of mean, nasty, ugly-lookin' people on the? bench there ... there was Microcoders, DPL hackers, File SystemfA hackers, and Window System HAckers!! Window System hacker sittin't> right there on the bench next to me! And the meanest, ugliest,E nastiest one... the kludgiest Window System hacker of them all... waspF comin' over to me, and he was mean and ugly and nasty and horrible andC all kinds of things, and he sat down next to me. He said, "Kid, youaD get a new copy of the sources?" I said, "I didn't get nothin'. I had to rebuild the world load."t  ?         He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?" and I said,eB "Littering..." And they all moved away from me on the bench there,B with the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean, nasty things, 'til IC said, "And making gratuitous modifications to LMIO; sources..." AndhA they all came back, shook my hand, and we had a great time on the4D bench talkin' about microcoding, DPL designing, file-system hacking,C ... and all kinds of groovy things that we was talkin' about on theo bench, and everything was fine.e  F         We was drinking Coke smoking all kinds of things, until the RA; came over, had some paper in his hand, held it up and said:n   "KIDS-THIS-EXAM-S-GOT-FOURTY2 SEVEN-WORDS-THIRTY-SEVEN-MULTIPLE-CHOICE-QUESTIONS- FIFTY-EIGHT-WORDS-WE-WANT-TO-KNOW-THE-DETAILSe( OF-THE-HACK-THE-TIME-OF-THE-HACK-AND-ANY" OTHER-KIND-OF-THING-YOU-GOT-TO-SAY* PERTAINING-TO-AND-ABOUT-THE-HACK-ANY-OTHERO KIND-OF-THING-YOU-GOT-TO-SAY-WE-WANT-TO-KNOW-THE-ARRESTED-PROCESS'-NAME-AND-ANYb OTHER-KIND-OF-THING..."n  F And he talked for forty-five minutes and nobody understood a word thatC he said. But we had fun rolling the mice around and clickin' on theh buttons.  H         I filled out the special form with the four-level macro definingD macros.  Typed it in there just like it was and everything was fine.E And I put down my keyboard, and I switched buffers, and there ...  in,? the other buffer...  centered in the other buffer...  away fromeA everything else in the buffer... in parentheses, capital letters,sA backquotated, in 43VXMS, read the following words: "Kid, have youu featurized yourself"?t  E         I went over to the RA. Said, "Mister, you got a lot of damnedrA gall to ask me if I've featurized myself!  I mean, I mean, I meanlH that you send, I'm sittin' here on the bench, I mean I'm sittin' here onC the Lisp Machine Group bench, 'cause you want to know if I'm losingsF enough to join the Lab, burn PROMs, power supplies, and documentation, after bein' on SF-LOVERS?"  F ----------------------------------------------------------------------G         He looked at me and said, "Kid, we don't like your kind!  We'refE gonna send your user-id off to the DCA in Washington"!  And, friends,oC somewhere in Washington, enshrined on some little floppy disk, is ae@ study in ones and zeros of my brain-damaged programming style...F ----------------------------------------------------------------------  F         And the only reason I'm singin' you the song now is 'cause youD may know somebody in a similar situation. Or you may be in a similarC situation, and if you're in a situation like that, there's only one  thing you can do:i  
 [ CHORUS ]  D         You  know, if one person, just one person, does it, they may4 think he's really dangerous and they won't take him.  C         And if two people do it, in harmony, they may think they're 5 both LISP hackers and they won't take either of them.W  @         And if three people do it!  Can you imagine three peopleE walkin' in, singin' a bar of "MIT's AI Lab" and walkin' out? They maye5 think it's an re-implementation of the window system!   E         And can you imagine fifty people a day? I said FIFTY people asA day, walkin' in, singin' a bar of "MIT's AI Lab" and walkin' out?eC Friends, they may think it's a MOVEMENT, and that's what it is: THEhD MIT AI LAB ANTI-LOSSAGE MOVEMENT! And all you gotta do to join is to= sing it the next time it comes around on the circular buffer.e           With feelin'.a   You can hack anything you want on MIT Lisp Machines You can hack anything you want on MIT Lisp Machines Walk right in and begin to hackv) Just push your stuff right onto the stackw You can hack anything you want on MIT Lisp Machines  8 (but dont forget to fix the bug...on MIT Lisp Machines!)   --  3 gkn	Gerard K. Newman		gkn@sds.sdsc.edu	619.534.5076sA 	San Diego Supercomputer Center	gkn@sdsc.bitnet		619.534.5152 FAXm% 	PO Box 85608			sdsc::gkn (27.1/span)A# 	San Diego, CA  92186-9784	ucsd!gkn-