+ X-NEWS: spcvxb alt.folklore.computers: 5155 I Relay-Version: VMS News - V6.0 13.10.90 VAX/VMS V5.4; site spcvxb.spc.edu > Path: spcvxb.spc.edu!njin!rutgers!att!bu.edu!bass.bu.edu!ardai" Newsgroups: alt.folklore.computers% Subject: Re: Computer Christmas songs ! Message-ID: <68111@bu.edu.bu.edu> ' From: ardai@bass.bu.edu (Michael Ardai)  Date: 8 Nov 90 01:36:32 GMT  Sender: news@bu.edu.bu.edu4 References: <1990Nov7.155401.14194@cs.rochester.edu> Distribution: alt  Organization: Boston University 
 Lines: 137  g In article <1990Nov7.155401.14194@cs.rochester.edu> ferguson@cs.rochester.edu (George Ferguson) writes: I >With the holiday season around the corner...  Does anyone remember those H >computerized versions of the old Christmas classics? I mean things like> >"Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" which started something like: >  >	make list  >	check list; check list >	who | grep naughty > naughty >	who | grep nice > nice >   F This was posted here at BU a few years back, written by Richard Alpert       better !pout !cry      better watchout      lpr why #     santa claus < north pole > town        cat /etc/passwd > list     ncheck list      ncheck list (     cat list | grep naughty > nogiftlist#     cat list | grep nice > giftlist $     santa claus < north pole >  town       who | grep sleeping      who | grep awake     who | grep bad || good     for (goodness sake) {  			 be good  			}     better !pout !cry      better watchout      lpr why #     santa claus < north pole > town   B And then there is this golden oldie (not quite a song, but close):  0                        A VISIT FROM ST. NICHOLAS0                        -------------------------  E Twas the nocturnal segment of the diurnal period preceding the annual D yuletide celebration, and throughout our place of residence, kineticD activity was not in evidence among the possessors of this potential,@ including that species of domestic rodent known as Mus Musculus.D Hosiery was meticulously suspended from the forward edge of the wood@ burning caloric apparatus, pursuant to our anticipatory pleasureA regarding an imminent visitation from the eccentric philantropist @ among whose folkloric appellations is the honorific title of St.
 Nicholas.   D The prepubescent siblings, comfortably ensconced in their respective? accommodations of repose, were experiencing subconscious visual B hallucinations of variegated fruit confections moving rhythmicallyC through their cerebrums.  My conjugal partner and I, attired in our D nocturnal head coverings, were about to take slumberous advantage ofB the hibernal darkness when upon the avenaceous exterior portion ofE the grounds there ascended such a cacophony of dissonance that I felt @ compelled to arise with alacrity from my place of repose for the3 purpose of ascertaining the precise source thereof.   B Hastening to the casement, I forthwith opened the barriers sealing= this fenestration, noting thereupon that the lunar brilliance C without, reflected as it was on the surface of a recent crystalline @ precipitation, might be said to rival that of the solar meridianA itself-- thus permitting my incredulous optical sensory organs to > behold a miniature airborne runnered conveyance drawn by eightB diminutive specimens of the genus Rangifer, piloted by a minisculeE aged chauffeur so ebullient and nimble that it became instantly aware : to me that he was indeed our anticipated caller.  With hisD ungulate motive power travelling at what may possibly have been moreD vertiginious velocity than patriotic alar predators, he voiciferated? loudly, expelled breath musically through contracted labia, and D addressed each of the octet by his or her respective cognomen - "Now= Dasher, now Dancer..." et al. - guiding them to the uppermost D exterior level of our abode, through which structure I could readily= distinguish the concatenations of each of the 32 cloven pedal 
 extremities.    > As I retracted my cranium from its erstwhile location, and wasD performing a 180-degree pivot, our distinguished visitant achieved -B with utmost celerity and via a downward leap - entry by way of theB smoke passage.  He was clad entirely in animal pelts soiled by theB ebon residue  from the oxidations of carboniferous fuels which hadE accumulated on the walls thereof.  His resemblence to a street vendor C I attributed largely to the plethora of assorted playthings he bore * dorsally in a commodious cloth receptacle.  > His orbs were scintillant with reflected luminosity, while hisA submaxiallary dermal indentations gave every evidence of engaging : amiablity.  The capillaries of his malar regions and nasalE appurtenance were engorged with blood which suffused the subcutaneous B layers, the former approximating the coloration of Albion's floralB emblem, the latter that of the Prunus Avium, or sweet cherry.  HisC amusing sub- and supralabials resembled nothing so much as a common C loop knot, and their ambient hirsute facial adornment appeared like 5 small, tabular and columnar crystals of frozen water.   C Clenched firmly between his incisors was a smoking piece whose gray C fumes, forming a tenuous ellipse about his occiput, were suggestive E of a decorative seasonal circlet of holly.  His visage was wider than > it was high, and when he waxed audibly mirthful, his corpulantD abdominal region undulated in the manner of impectinated fruit syrupA in a hemispherical container,  He was, in short, neither more nor < less than an obese, jocund, multigenarian gnome, the optical? perception of whom rendered me risibly frolicsome despite every > effort to refrain from so being.  By rapidly lowering and thenC elevating one eyelid and rotating his head slightly to one side, he 5 indicated that trepidation on my part was groundless.   = Without utterance and with dispatch, he commenced filling the B aforementioned appended hosiery with various of the aforementionedD articles of merchandise extracted from the aforementioned previouslyE dorsally transported cloth receptacle.  Upon completion of this task, A he executed an abrupt about-face, placed a single manual digit in C lateral juxtaposition of his olefactory organ, inclined his cranium @ forward in a gesture of leave-taking, and forthwith effected his@ egress by renegotiating (in reverse) the smoke passage.  He thenC propelled himself in a short vector onto his conveyance, directed a B musical expulsion of air  through his contracted oral sphincter toC the antlered quadrupeds of burden, and proceeded to soar aloft in a D movement hitherto observable chiefly among the seed-bearing portionsC of a common weed.  But I overheard his parting exclamation, audible : immediately prior to his vehiculation beyond the limits ofE visibility:  "Ecstatic yuletide to the planetary constituancy, and to @ that selfsame assemblage, my sincerest wishes for a salubriouslyH beneficial and gratifyingly pleasurable period between sunset and dawn."        E (Originally from Eleonore Johnson at Teknowledge by way of Peter Karp   and Info-Cobol) --/ \|/ Michael L. Ardai     ardai@bu-pub.bu.edu    C --- --------------------------------------------------------------- " /|\ ...!sun!teda!ardai (preferred)